Monday, September 12, 2011

So much for cutting the cheese, I ate it!

Hello everyone, as if you hadn't noticed, when school is in, I may be hard to find. Sorry for lack of posts, but unfortunately school has to have most of my brain attention. I did want to drop in and let you guys weigh in on one of my recent indiscretions. When I started this blog, I promised to take you through my whole journey, the good and the bad. Well yesterday, I did the bad.
Coming up on my 5 month anniversary of being a vegan, I decided I wanted cheese. Now don't think for a second that I just had this craving and immediately ate a whole half of of a 16 inch cheese pizza (and yes I really did that yesterday). These thoughts of cheese I have been sitting on for a while. I kept thinking it would go away just like all the other times, but alas it never did. Instead of continuing trying to fight it, I gave in to what I called "cheat" day. but here is the kicker, now I am not sure I can go back. Don't get me wrong, I will never go back to consuming dairy products like before, and I never really plan on eating meat, as I never even get cravings for it anymore, but let's face it, being a vegan can be challenging. Sometimes I get tired of passing on food that I really really want to eat.  It made me think, why was I being so hard on myself? Never allowing myself to really indulge a little? That leads me to my next question, will I still be considered a vegan is I occasionally eat some cheese, and how often will I eat it? Should I change the name of the blog? Will I be able to control how much I eat if I allow it back?
These are all questions I have been pondering for about a week now. Can I turn my back on all the info I have learned in five months of research on this lifestyle? Up until now, this lifestyle has came pretty easy to me, however I literally feel like I woke up one day and all my bearings about it were off and I can't seem to shake it. This journey has now become a struggle and I wonder if the extra stress is worth it. As I figure these things Ot, I will continue to share my thoughts and questions, so stay tuned to see were I go on the path and as always, your support and feedback is so welcomed and appreciated